New Year’s Resolutions

snow day baking The day Christmas passed, I was ready.  Ready to take out the tree and rearrange the living room.  Ready to trade gingerbread for Vietnamese food and egg nog for tea.  I adore the holiday season, but I am ready to fold up all the shimmer and traditions and let it just be winter.  Welcome, New Year.

I am irresolute and always have ambivalence toward resolutions, but the other strand is this: I don’t want to lose 10 lb.  I don’t want to exercise.  I don’t want to be kinder or more generous or smarter.  In fact, I don’t want to see this year as an opportunity for personal betterment at all.  I have always been so bent on self-improvement, and I suppose I still am, in a way.  But for now I am more inclined to see the year ahead as a gift, something good and given freely, something I have never earned and never will.  And instead of resolving to be more or better, I feel more like giving myself a gift.  Like resolving to have ice cream at least once a week.  Or resolving to go outside early in the morning, even just for a minute or two.  Or resolving to drink more  (were I not pregnant) or keep a vase of flowers on the table or take the kids out for croissants on Wednesdays.

These are resolutions that I can get behind, can drum up some enthusiasm for. Welcome, 2013.

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